Can I Really Be Friends With His EX?
The 3 women in this picture have lots in common. First of all, we enjoy dressing like Lucy to stomp grapes at a local winery. Fun girls day! But more importantly we all love the same children. Why? Because we all love or have loved the men who fathered them.
This isn’t really as Jerry Springer as it sounds. Basically the gal in the middle has 2 ex-husbands, and has no problem forming friendships with the women who are step-mothers to her children. You know what I call that? Terrific!
I know it gets a little confusing with multiple marriages and multiple exes, so let me just address what it means for me. It means I have a friend (who just happens to be my husband’s ex-wife) who has a very similar situation to my own. She is a working, blended family mother of 5. She has crazy busy schedules to keep up with, and always has a million things coming at her at once. Her youngest daughter is a bit of a handful, and sometimes people don’t understand the added pressure that puts on her. Guess what, that daughter is also my step-daughter, so I can relate in a way that perhaps no one else can.
The great part about this friendship is that we communicate openly and work with each other in order to simplify our complicated situation. Yesterday, for example, we arranged our “kid pick up” time later in the evening so that I could skip traffic. Sometimes helping each other out in those little ways makes a big difference!
I think it’s great too for this little girl to see her mother and me as friends and allies. What better way to demonstrate forgiveness, grace and love than to model it?!
I will say it’s a good idea not to talk too much about your husband. I would never discuss problems my man and I might be having with each other, or say anything that would be negative toward him. And I don’t engage in conversations about her past relationship with him. Keep things positive and in the present and you won’t get into uncomfortable territory.
And I do have to mention how this friendship came about. She convinced me to try a product called Nerium. She’d started selling this night cream and just kept texting me about trying it. I finally gave in and within a week I liked it so much that I not only bought it, I joined her team as a Brand Partner. Now we talk or text nearly every day!
We both love the idea that we are launching a business that
will give us the additional income and flexibility to change our lives, and the
future for all of our children. If you’d
like to learn more about this product and the business behind it, click HERE to
visit my website. If you're in the DFW area and want to attend a Nerium party with me & my Ex-Wife-in-Law, let me know in a comment and I'll send you directions to the next party.
Do you have any advice or stories to share about forming friendships with your EWIL’s? I’d love to hear them!